You Know You've Been in the Hospital Too Long When ...

1. You start developing a fondness for the hospital posters in the same way you adored the rock-band posters in your high school bedroom.

2. Your hands start cracking and bleeding from washing too many times and people ask you if you've been in a fight.

3. You not only start recognizing people in the hallways in your building, but in the other buildings too ... and several of them say "hello" when you walk by.

4. You scurry to get your afternoon coffee at 2:45pm because you know the Starbucks Frappy Hour starts at 3:00pm and the line-up will be five-times as long.

5. The doctors and you kind of look at each other and shrug your shoulders during morning rounds, instead of talking about your daughter's status and strategies, and then talk about their kids and their college plans.

6. You get annoyed when you see people use your secret bathroom ... even though there's nothing secret about it.

7. The lady behind the grill in the cafeteria asks, "The usual?" when she sees you.

8. You laugh out loud in the elevator when you hear people complaining about their long stay of two nights, and scramble to turn the laugh into a really fake sounding cough (yeah, that was awkward).

9. You discover hallway short-cuts that none of the doctors or nurses knew about (or even really care about when you excitedly bring them up and kind of look at you with that "Yeaaah" wince-like look on their face).

10. The social workers who have their weekly pot-luck in the conference room by your room ask if you want to join them ... and then, at the end, say you should join them again next week.